divorce: 3 Articles

That Missing Feeling: Interview with the Author

Children experiencing divorce can feel a sense of loss as they adapt to new living arrangements and family dynamics. Amy Ludwig VanDerwater wrote That Missing Feeling about this experience, and shared insights about creating the book in this interview with Magination Press. Magination Press: What inspired you to write That Missing Feeling? Amy Ludwig VanDerwater: A few things. Many years ago, I taught a writing workshop in which a child said, "When I'm with my mom, I miss my dad. When I'm with my dad, I miss my mom. My brother and sister feel the same way." Then, when I was 40, my own parents divorced. Lastly, I visited a school a few years ago and talked about how we can write about what we miss in our notebooks. One little girl stayed to talk with me about missing her house since her parents were newly divorced. I gave her a pretty notebook that I had in the trunk of my car, and months later when I visited again, she told me she still had it. MP: Why do children need books about divorce? ALV: Children need books about everything...experiences they have had or may someday have, experiences their friends have, experiences they hear about. Books open our hearts and our heads and help us learn different ways to be. Divorce, while sometimes necessary, is a brokenness, and we humans need to make sense of things that are broken. MP: Why did you decide to have Mia’s grandpa give her a journal? ALV: I have kept a journal for many years, and this has gotten me through some happy and some tough spots. It seemed right that Mia's grandpa would figure out a helpful thing to do when he saw her suffering. Grandparents often just know. MP: People are feeling a lot of loss due to the COVID-19 pandemic. How do you think That Missing Feeling and journaling could be especially helpful right now? ALV: There are so many ways to handle missing feelings, and writing is one of them. Today I am missing my son, who will come home and eat dinner outside in 30 degree weather with us as we cannot safely have him in our home. I miss hugging my mother and seeing friends. All of us are experiencing different forms of missing, from in-person school to our normal jobs to what used to be simply routine. Journaling can help us get through rough patches, whether it is drawing or writing words or making collages. Feelings want to come out, and a notebook or a journal is a place where we can bring feelings out into the open. This does not mean we need to share our pages; sometimes writing or drawing wants to stay private. MP: When did you start to keep a journal or notebook? ALV: My first diary was a pink and white gingham book with a wee gold lock and key. The lines were small, and as I was only six, my

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That Missing Feeling: Interview with the Author 2021-01-26T13:28:16-05:00

Resources About Divorce for Your Child

January is known as “divorce month1” because there’s a surge in the number of people contacting attorneys to explore divorce after the holidays. Even if they don’t file until March, many people start this process in January. Research reported in Scientific American in 20132 indicates that 1.5 million children are affected by divorce each year. Their research examined the long-term impact of divorce on children and found that while “the breakup may be painful, ...most kids adjust well over time.” The article also states that, “(p)arents can also support their children during this difficult time by talking to them clearly about the divorce and its implications and answering their questions fully.” Below you'll find a few examples of our books about divorce and blended families to help you explore the issue with your child. Check out our complete list of books about divorce and blended families for titles that best meet your child’s needs.   That Missing Feeling by Amy Ludwig VanDerWater, ages 4-8 Mia’s life feels split in two after her parents get divorced—even her cat and dog now live in two separate places. When she’s at her dad’s house, Mia misses her mom’s jokes and singing. And when she’s at her mom’s house, she misses her dad’s laugh and cooking. Mia just can’t quite shake that missing feeling.   My Parents Are Divorced, Too: A Book for Kids By Kids, Second Edition by Melanie, Annie, and Steven Ford, as told to Jann Blackstone-Ford, ages 8-13 Melanie, Annie, and Steven Ford pack lots of simple truths and "I have been through it" advice into this wise little book about their struggles and triumphs through their parents' divorce. Now in its second edition, with more insights and humor from cartoonist Charles Beyl, this is the guide for kids with divorced parents, from some of the best teachers around — kids like themselves!   Ginny Morris and Dad’s New Girlfriend by Mary Collins Gallagher, MA, LPC, ages 8-12 Ginny Morris's parents are divorced, which is bad enough, but now her dad has a girlfriend! Who is this strange man who's become a clean freak and smiles all the time? Will her dad still be the same dad? Will he still have time for her? Does this ruin any chance her parents will get back together? Does her mom care that Dad has a girlfriend? Is it okay if Ginny likes his girlfriend? Ginny sorts through her feelings with the help of her best friend, her journal — and finally, some heart-to-heart talks with Mom and Dad themselves. Check out the Ginny Morris companion book, Ginny Morris and Mom’s House, Dad’s House.   My Mom and Dad Don't Live Together Anymore: A Drawing Book For Children of Separated or Divorced Parents by Judith Aron Rubin, PhD, ages 4-12 Some things are easier to say with pictures. When parents decide to separate or divorce, children need ways to sort through all the feelings, thoughts, and worries they are facing. This drawing book encourages

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Resources About Divorce for Your Child 2021-01-06T21:26:36-05:00

That Missing Feeling

Mia’s parents divorced and she feels split in two. When she’s with her dad, she misses her mom. When she’s with her mom, she misses her dad. Everything is different. Even her cat and dog don’t live in the same place anymore. She always feels like something is missing, and that makes her sad and angry. Her grandpa understands “that missing feeling” since her grandma died. He gives her a notebook to write her feelings and memories. It’s what he does when he misses Grandma and it helps him feel better. “Life changes, and writing helps me think about these changes.” Mia tries writing in her notebook, and soon she finds a way to balance that missing feeling. Hear author Amy Ludwig VanDerwater read That Missing Feeling aloud.

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That Missing Feeling 2021-01-20T13:08:37-05:00