✩ “Shines a light on the hidden problem of unhoused children…A compassion-and-action-awakening book.” – Booklist In the brown house, Claire and Wes were home. But home turned to nowhere and nowhere turned to anywhere. Then somewhere finally came, and finally, always. This lyrical story is timely and thoughtful, depicting the life of two children thrust into homelessness and uncertain housing situations. Throughout, the duo is challenged by uncomfortable new places and inquiries from strangers, but ultimately, never lose their optimism or determination. Read an excerpt from the Reader's Note providing guidance for talking with children about homelessness. Hear Tonya Lippert read Home aloud.Read More
About Tonya Lippert, Ph.D, LCSWTonya Lippert, PhD, LCSW, studied developmental psychology and clinical social work, is the co-author of a book on ADHA, was a visiting professor at Reed College, worked at the Oregon Social Learning Center, and currently runs mental health therapy groups at Kaiser Permanente. She lives in Portland, OR.
HOME by Tonya Lippert, PhD, LCSW depicts the lives of two children thrust into homelessness and uncertain housing situations as they move out of their house, to a motel, to a shelter, and finally another more permanent home. Throughout, the duo is challenged by uncomfortable new places and inquiries from strangers, but ultimately, never lose their optimism or determination. They have each other, no matter at home, nowhere, anywhere, or somewhere—always. Here’s an excerpt from the Reader’s Note. I wrote HOME with the hope of increasing empathy for homeless families and children. I wrote it to encourage caregivers’ discussions with children about homelessness that would remind children that we are all connected and all worthy of love, safety, and dignity. I even envisioned grown-ups reading this book to homeless children, sharing that I was born into homelessness and grew up to write this book, letting children know that they, too, can grow up to better lives. It’s helpful for grown-ups to talk honestly and openly about homelessness and what it means to children and families to live without a home of their own. Families can be homeless anywhere. When people lose their homes they tend to move toward towns and cities. Some have enough money for hotels and motels. When they have no more money for them, they might stay with friends or family. Or, if they have no one to stay with, they might go to shelters. During disasters such as floods, schools, sports arenas, and other large places might become temporary shelters. People who are unwilling or unable to stay at any of these places might go wherever they can find a place that is hidden from other people and adverse weather to sleep. When talking to children about homelessness, be honest about its causes. Research indicates that the leading causes are 1) poverty (not having enough money) combined with 2) lack of affordable housing. In other words, it comes down to money. Yes, there are some people who are homeless for other reasons, however, the reality is that the biggest factor is money: how little one has and how much homes cost. Rather than blaming homelessness on individuals, we’d do better to change its causes. Many people work to help children and families who are homeless. And you can too! To learn more, explore the places below. The Homeless Families Foundation offers ideas about how to help. Project Nite Nite donates a book, blanket, and stuffed animal to homeless children. To research and better understand homelessness, visit the National Center on Family Homelessness.Read More
All children experience changes and transitions - moving, changing schools, a friend leaving town. These changes can bring uncertainty and sadness about what a child may "lose", such as friends, caregivers, teachers, comforting rituals. This is common even when there's excitement about what may be next. Transitions and changes can become times where we recognize how much we care about someone or something. When we feel a sense of loss, it's because we care. Changes and transitions are not disconnected starts and stops from everyday life; they are bridges between the past and the future. You can help children carry a sense of wholeness and continuity through the impermanent landscapes of their lives. Changes are bridges between the past and the future. Below are a few guidelines and examples of what you can say to a child experiencing a change or transition. You'll want to adjust what you say and how you say it according to a child's developmental level and what you know about your child. Also, children often need repetition and may want to have the discussion more than once. Your child may repeat it to you, as they try to strengthen their understanding of what is happening. Acknowledge the transition. Acknowledge the change or transition and the feelings that often come with it. For example, you might say, "You are going to have a different school (home, class, etc.) now. People can feel a lot of different ways when something like this happens. Some kids feel sad, some scared, and some mad. Some might feel excited about some of the things that will be different." Express and validate feelings. Ask about your child's feelings. Sometimes, children will only tell you something if you ask. You could ask, "How do you feel about going to a different school?" or "How do you feel about your friend moving away?" Children may express their feelings directly or indirectly. They may cry. They may want to avoid the discussion. Either way, allow and accept the feelings and let children know their feelings make sense. Listen without expressing judgment about their feelings and without telling them what they should feel. If a child expresses feelings directly, saying they are sad and/or mad, you might say, "Yeah, sometimes I also feel that way when things change but I want them to stay the same." If the child nods or otherwise shows that you've hit the mark, you might go further and recognize how hard it can be to accept what's out of our control. For example, you might add something along the lines of, "Sometimes I wish I had magic powers to make things be the way I want them." If a child expresses feelings indirectly, try to see what these feelings are or may be. For example, if a child puts their head down, you might try, "You seem sad." If you get no response and the child seems open to talking, you can check your perception with, "Are you sad?" ValidateRead More